This is the gift of my life
After meditating, I had a big relief I was looking for. I stopped having unnecessary thoughts that tormented me. I could concentrate better on my projects so my school performance improved. I went from worrying about the future all the time to appreciating the opportunities given to me in the present. I began to deeply appreciate things of everyday life and people around me. As I progressed in the meditation, I realized how selfish I was. I only thought about how to achieve my goals in my life. I could see that this took me away from my loved ones; my family and friends. I had failed to visualize my selfish being because I lived trapped inside a dream. I was not aware of that until I woke up from my dream.
Now, having completed all the levels of the meditation and having found my true mind, I want to give back, even a small amount, in reward for the huge gift that this method has given to me. I want many people to know the real purpose of life, which cannot be found in material things or from the desires or expectations that one has for the world. I found the way to become one with the world itself.
You start to see yourself, the way you are in all aspects of your life
The cool thing about this meditation method is that it has this ability to show you who you are from a much bigger perspective than yourself. It is really hard to see yourself as yourself, so the method has this way of showing yourself from a bigger perspective. Then you get to reflect on yourself on how you actually are and you see things in yourself. And I saw things in myself that I did not realize that I had before the method. I think that is one of the biggest strength of this meditation. Speaking from my own experience, I found it really hard to bring big changes within myself but this method has helped me get rid of my habits and useless negative thoughts.
I am definitely happier now and also just more relaxed. I feel better within myself and that is the best way to define happiness for me. Also, I am more focused. I mean I work with computers and it is important to have patience and really be able to focus throughout the day. I work with my head the whole day, thus it is so important to be able to be relaxed within myself. Not always trying to move, not always thinking about something else, just staying put; and the meditation has definitely helped me with that.
The meditation has also improved me as a husband and father. One problem that I think in many relationships I find is; you have this expectation of the other to give you something the whole time. You want to get something from that person. And I think the meditation has changed that perspective for me and my wife. It is now more about putting in the work yourself without underlying expectations for one another. Also, this meditation has changed the way I see my children. I seem them more as the way they are than I did before as a parent and as a father. There was a certain bias that came with the strong attachment that I had for my children. Getting rid of that, I think you start to see your family in a more realistic way. This is also good for the kids, because they feel that and they feel actually more relaxed around me.
The difference in my life … can be described with one word: Gratitude.
I don’t have any dramatic life story to tell. From the outside, my life looks quite ordinary. I grew up in a safe environment in a suburb in the outskirts of Stockholm. I had friends, a Nintendo video game and everything a kid could wish for. My family was not religious and relatively open-minded, so I was free to make my own life decisions. I graduated from university and got a job at an IT company and thought I would be happy but, in my mind, I was never truly happy. Every time I achieved something that I wanted, I just wanted something else, something more. I was constantly stuck in my thoughts with my wandering mind. I was always wondering, stuck in my own thoughts, asking myself why I had so many thoughts in my head. I tried so many different things to find an answer but everything I tried only gave me a temporary release.
Though very quickly I realized by doing this meditation that this thinking was about myself and the reason that I think so much and why I was so stressed was because I was caring only about myself. For me, I used to carry things that were unnecessary. I knew that ruminations were unnecessary and bad for me but I didn’t want to nor know how to let go. However, through this meditation method I learnt how to truly let go of the worries and thoughts and to me that is true relief.
Now, there is a huge difference between the me before and the me now. Before, I needed so many things in life to be happy. I needed my hobby and I needed to have certain people in my life. I thought I needed a lot of things. Now I have no worries about the future so with this mind I can just live and the universe will take care of things for me. Now I have also learned that when I sincerely care about others more than myself my stress fades away and I now know how to truly contribute to the world. The difference between my life before and after the meditation can be described with one word: Gratitude.
I feel so much gratitude for this meditation, for being able to let go, and for being able to confirm with my mind that I am fundamentally one with everything around me.
Every day is a clean slate after meeting this meditation.
Within one month after I started this meditation, my behavior and habits began to drastically change. I used to sit in the back of my classes at my university daydreaming to pass the time, but after a month of meditating diligently I was sitting at the front of the room eager to listen and learn. In fact, learning became fun and didn’t feel like an endless chore like it had in the past. Better yet, I began to raise my hand in class to ask questions and give answers, which I was scared to do in the past out of fear. I noticed myself gradually becoming a positive, proactive person and my grades showed it too.
As I looked back on myself it was as if I was deaf. Deaf to the world around me, thinking that all I had in my mind was right. I couldn’t listen to anyone. This meditation opened up my mind and all senses to the world around me.
All of the positive changes I experienced with the meditation were extremely natural. They happened just by subtracting my ‘self,’ my ego. None of my actions felt forced, so I never felt exhausted like I had when I was just telling myself to be a positive person and happy. I slowly but surely lost the life that was causing me nothing but problems, and a whole new life opened up for me full of endless possibilities. My focus changed from avoiding my problems to proactively finding them and fixing them, by subtraction. Each level of the meditation was different and had a different enlightenment to look forward to, which made it enjoyable and exciting.