My son was diagnosed with an intellectual disability three years ago. When I heard from the doctor that he had an intellectual disability at the hospital, I hugged my husband and cried profusely. It felt like my son and I had ended our lives. When the feeling of despair subsided, the next emotion that came to me was a shame. Having a disabled son, I felt inferior and embarrassed to take him to crowded places. Those who have lived with negative thoughts such as despair, inferiority, and shame in my heart will know. How unhappy and depressing. I wanted to do anything if I could take off this burden of my heart. So I meditated. I wanted to let go of this negativity I felt and love my son who is handicapped but so adorable. Every day I looked into my heart. And I threw away the hardships I had while raising him and the memories of feeling upset and worried when he did not grow as much as I expected.
Miracles were not made by meditation. I did not see any improvement in my son’s IQ. However, we slowly grew up together. Just as a child’s body grows little by little every day, I also grew as a mother.
By meditating on myself every day, I took my child one step at a time, little by little. I no longer worry about his future. The anticipation of unhappiness has left me. Things will get better. It’s my confidence that I can make it happen.
I don’t feel ashamed of my son. While the learning speed is slower than that of ordinary children, I know my boy is a talented child who can shine whenever he meets a good teacher. My son and I have been talking a lot recently, and I have learned that he has a keen interest in history. My son, for example, taught that General Hannibal’s Carthage was now Tunisia and Algeria.
These days, I try to let go of my obsession with my son so that I can help him grow up to be a good man. My heart is filled with courage. I had many difficulties raising my son, but thanks to these difficulties, I was able to mature. It makes the happy moments even more precious.
If you want to learn how to meditate and practice to think positive, schedule your free 30-minute consultation. Thank you!
